I have the best dad.
He's a country boy, I'll kick your ass kind of a guy, as in he loves his horse and his dog and his beat up t-shirt. He'd rather be bush hogging a backfield than playing a round of golf. He builds fences and mucks out stables. He's happiest driving down a long, old dirt road that ends at a meadow with a shimmering lake full of fish waiting to be caught.
He's a sage who never learned that you reach a point in your life where you've got it all figured out. He's journeying to the mountains on weekends to retreat and discover the wisdom of dreams. He can look into your eyes and pretty much sum up what lies in your heart. He listens with careful attention and only offers advice when persistently requested. He reads with relish the likes of Thomas Merton and Karl Jung and Richard Rohr, and his life reflects their rich spirituality. He wouldn't like that I'm bragging on his insatiable curiosity about God, about people, about the Christ whom he serves with devotion and gratitude.
He's a recovering corporate warrior who travels at dawn, precisely packed, an expeditor extraordinaire, and a surfer, with a knack for finding just the right wave because he is patient and knows the art of biding his time. He is the playful Poppy, beloved to his granddaughters for bursting in on a scene of jumping on the bed and joining right in.
He knows how to raise a daughter. He had different rules for me than my brothers. I wasn't allowed to say any bad words, like fart. I had to be home at eleven. No dates until I was 17. Working the late night shift at an ice cream shop was strictly forbidden ("no daughter of mine is closing up shop by herself and driving home late at night"). He nurtured my dreams of going back to the south for college, to the alma mater of my ancestors. He teased that I was going to Furman so I could fall in love just like he and Mama did, just like Poppa and Jenky did. And wouldn't you know, he was right?
He was my first love, as every daddy of little girls should be in my opinion. During a drawn-out dry spell, with no suitors in sight, when I was 16 going on 17, he took me on my first date. We dined at Timothy's in Scottsdale, a fancy pants kind of restaurant. I sipped my first glass of wine (didn't really like it back then; my how times have changed), learned which fork to use, and delighted in a conversation full of dreams for the future. He was setting the bar for those suitors to come. He set it high.
I am blessed to have known the love of a faithful father who has loved my mama for going on 43 years. I am blessed to have known at the way-too-young age of 19 what I wanted in a man who would one day be the father to my children. I wanted a man with my father's heart. And I found him.
Praying for good fathers for all of God's children. Praying for the one true Faithful Father to gather the fatherless in His arms. Praying for the future fathers we are raising.
Sunday, June 17, 2012
Saturday, May 26, 2012
when love comes to town
guess why there are no new blog entries?
he's 21 months old...
the big sisters are very active...
i'm almost about to graduate from yoga teacher training...
hello...this is your 41 year old self reminding you that IT'S A LOT DIFFERENT THIS TIME AROUND.
you know how in your 20/30's you blink and your kids are in elementary school? i've decided that is not going to happen this time. my days are pretty much spent in the same room with the same toys with a very smart little boy reminding him that i'm his mama and i'm not going anywhere. i think he's starting to get it.
the big girls were 5 months and 10 months at their adoption; little guy was 19 months. we've been home about 7 weeks and finally, finally we are getting some traction. he's smiling. he's laughing. he's hugging. and it's amazing. i've never worked so hard in my life.
what you do with an orphaned soul, what you do with anyone, is just get into their world. speak their language. play their way. spend lots of time doing what they love to do. here's what i've been doing: stacking stackable cups any which-way. racing cars any which-way. saying ahh any which-way. our boy is missing the muscle to be able to speak words (it's being repaired in July). but oh my goodness does he speak. expressive eyebrows. lots of screeching. he's making the cars say vroom, vroom, vroom. and he loves to dance. and he laughs.
resurrection life is happening right in front of us. Levi and me and daddy and big sisters. when loves come to town, you better catch that train.
he's 21 months old...
the big sisters are very active...
i'm almost about to graduate from yoga teacher training...
hello...this is your 41 year old self reminding you that IT'S A LOT DIFFERENT THIS TIME AROUND.
you know how in your 20/30's you blink and your kids are in elementary school? i've decided that is not going to happen this time. my days are pretty much spent in the same room with the same toys with a very smart little boy reminding him that i'm his mama and i'm not going anywhere. i think he's starting to get it.
the big girls were 5 months and 10 months at their adoption; little guy was 19 months. we've been home about 7 weeks and finally, finally we are getting some traction. he's smiling. he's laughing. he's hugging. and it's amazing. i've never worked so hard in my life.
what you do with an orphaned soul, what you do with anyone, is just get into their world. speak their language. play their way. spend lots of time doing what they love to do. here's what i've been doing: stacking stackable cups any which-way. racing cars any which-way. saying ahh any which-way. our boy is missing the muscle to be able to speak words (it's being repaired in July). but oh my goodness does he speak. expressive eyebrows. lots of screeching. he's making the cars say vroom, vroom, vroom. and he loves to dance. and he laughs.
resurrection life is happening right in front of us. Levi and me and daddy and big sisters. when loves come to town, you better catch that train.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
China: A Retrospective
I had every intention of posting minute-by-minute musings as Mama and I journeyed through China to adopt our boy. And as soon as I met Levi, those intentions went right out the window. Because I'm 41 and I realized that these sweet moments of beginnings with babies are fleeting. And also because getting on the internet in still-communist China is cumbersome. So instead, here I am, feeling every one of my 41 years, jet lagged beyond words, and reunited with my beloved and Levi's adoring big sisters. I think it is the best place to reflect on our adoption adventure.
My brain is a bit mushy and the moments of lucidity are short-lived at this point, but I promise to highlight the good, the bad, and the not-so-pretty happenings along our path in China.
Here's a little blurb about Beijing: Tianamen Square is not written about in Chinese textbooks studied by schoolchildren. The information that the Chinese people can access is severely limited by the government there. The Great Wall is truly Great. Hiking to the top of it, twice in my lifetime, is one of my favorite memories. Doing it with my mom was thrilling. I didn't really like the food in Beijing, even though I had a stern pre-trip talk with myself about relishing the new flavors and cuisine. I just couldn't stomach the smell of Chinese food for breakfast, but I also couldn't stomach the Western french fries either. I stuck with croissants, strawberry jam, and the best black tea I've ever tasted.
Our guide, George, has a providential life story (well, we all do really, don't we?), and one of my favorite memories of the two days in China's capital is the time spent learning about him. More about that later!
The best part of life in a bustling, 14 + million city? We got an email from our adoption agency that our flight for Zhenzhou (the provincial capital of Henan where Levi lived) had to be moved up from traveling Monday evening to traveling Monday morning. No explanation was given, but I trusted my instinct that we would be united with our babies on Monday afternoon...
The Beijing blitz portion of our trip was just what it was meant to be: busy, informative, a settling in to the rhythm of life in China.
My brain is a bit mushy and the moments of lucidity are short-lived at this point, but I promise to highlight the good, the bad, and the not-so-pretty happenings along our path in China.
Here's a little blurb about Beijing: Tianamen Square is not written about in Chinese textbooks studied by schoolchildren. The information that the Chinese people can access is severely limited by the government there. The Great Wall is truly Great. Hiking to the top of it, twice in my lifetime, is one of my favorite memories. Doing it with my mom was thrilling. I didn't really like the food in Beijing, even though I had a stern pre-trip talk with myself about relishing the new flavors and cuisine. I just couldn't stomach the smell of Chinese food for breakfast, but I also couldn't stomach the Western french fries either. I stuck with croissants, strawberry jam, and the best black tea I've ever tasted.
Our guide, George, has a providential life story (well, we all do really, don't we?), and one of my favorite memories of the two days in China's capital is the time spent learning about him. More about that later!
The best part of life in a bustling, 14 + million city? We got an email from our adoption agency that our flight for Zhenzhou (the provincial capital of Henan where Levi lived) had to be moved up from traveling Monday evening to traveling Monday morning. No explanation was given, but I trusted my instinct that we would be united with our babies on Monday afternoon...
The Beijing blitz portion of our trip was just what it was meant to be: busy, informative, a settling in to the rhythm of life in China.
Friday, March 23, 2012
Soak it in
I rushed to the airport amidst tears and kissing hands and promises of skyping at bedtime. It is no small thing to leave two beloved (and heartbroken) girls at home to adopt little Levi. We talked about sacrifice in love, and how we all make sacrifices for the greater good of others in our lives and how this is a lesson we can hold onto when we feel sad and miss each other over the next 2 weeks. "But I just don't want you to go," are the wails that still ring in my ears. The ten-ager cried all day long yesterday, from what I'm told. Oh it wrings this mama's heart inside out. And did I really exhort her to consider the greater good? I did, but I also held her tight and whispered in her ear that nothing can separate us, really.
Mama and I watched Oscar winning movies on the flight over the North Pole! Who knew that I would be relishing 14 hours on an airplane? After the mad packing mania of the night before, it was a wonderful respite. Except for the super creepy dude sitting behind us that kept offering inappropriate suggestions when I made my way to the restroom...like "need help finding the toilet seat?" Ummm. That is not a good pick-up line. It's just gross. And you really should think about getting rid of that mullet.
We were driven to our hotel by a very brave soul on a very packed interstate with very nice cars. When I stepped out of the van and into the warmish Beijing night, I smelled China. I listened to all of the voices speaking in a musical different language, the birth language of my daughteres. I looked into what appeared to me to be hundreds of Chinese faces, the faces of my daughers. This is what I want to savor, to bask in, to relish--this being here in the culture that gave birth to the little girls and little boy that I love. I made a promise to myself that we would all come back, the 5 of us, on this journey so that they could know the feeling that I take for granted every day; that feeling of being one of many. I'm the outsider here in China, but their little faces and skin and bodies that God gave them would feel familiar at home here.
So, at 5:18am Beijing time I am off for my morning yoga on my cute fold-up yoga mat with my favorite playlist on my wonderful i-phone that I do not take for granted. And then the breakfast buffet! And then a day of touring with my sweet Mama--Forbidden City, Tianamen Square, and more are on the list for today.
The plan is to soak it all in! Bathe in the beauty! Savor!
Soak it in
I rushed to the airport amidst tears and kissing hands and promises of skyping at bedtime. It is no small thing to leave two beloved (and heartbroken) girls at home to adopt little Levi. We talked about sacrifice in love, and how we all make sacrifices for the greater good of others in our lives and how this is a lesson we can hold onto when we feel sad and miss each other over the next 2 weeks. "But I just don't want you to go," are the wails that still ring in my ears. The ten-ager cried all day long yesterday, from what I'm told. Oh it wrings this mama's heart inside out. And did I really exhort her to consider the greater good? I did, but I also held her tight and whispered in her ear that nothing can separate us, really.
Mama and I watched Oscar winning movies on the flight over the North Pole! Who knew that I would be relishing 14 hours on an airplane? After the mad packing mania of the night before, it was a wonderful respite. Except for the super creepy dude sitting behind us that kept offering inappropriate suggestions when I made my way to the restroom...like "need help finding the toilet seat?" Ummm. That is not a good pick-up line. It's just gross. And you really should think about getting rid of that mullet.
We were driven to our hotel by a very brave soul on a very packed interstate with very nice cars. When I stepped out of the van and into the warmish Beijing night, I smelled China. I listened to all of the voices speaking in a musical different language, the birth language of my daughteres. I looked into what appeared to me to be hundreds of Chinese faces, the faces of my daughers. This is what I want to savor, to bask in, to relish--this being here in the culture that gave birth to the little girls and little boy that I love. I made a promise to myself that we would all come back, the 5 of us, on this journey so that they could know the feeling that I take for granted every day; that feeling of being one of many. I'm the outsider here in China, but their little faces and skin and bodies that God gave them would feel familiar at home here.
So, at 5:18am Beijing time I am off for my morning yoga on my cute fold-up yoga mat with my favorite playlist on my wonderful i-phone that I do not take for granted. And then the breakfast buffet! And then a day of touring with my sweet Mama--Forbidden City, Tianamen Square, and more are on the list for today.
The plan is to soak it all in! Bathe in the beauty! Savor!
Monday, March 19, 2012
Dreaming
I spent the weekend on the sidelines of a soccer field in beautiful 70 degree Maryland spring weather. I watched a lithe 13 year old athletic girl sprint, kick, laugh, play, enjoy life. I chatted with other adoptive mothers about the lives of our children and how differently they could have turned out. Our three pairs of eyes filled with tears as we talked about the month one spent in Columbia to bring home her 11 year old son. He has been with his forever family for 9 months and is a straight-A student (just learned English 9 months ago--woah!). And we commiserated together as another shared her adopted from Russia daughter's painful growth plate injury and how it kept her away from soccer in the fall and how she is feeling so much better now.
I sat in the sunshine and remembered the adoption travel conference call that I listened to earlier this week. Our amazing adoption agency's founder, Josh with CCAI, reminded us that without action these waiting children (like our Levi) would live out their lives in an orphanage, with no treatment, no education, no real hope. His cleft palate would likely remain untreated and he would be the equivalent of an "untouchable" in China.
So that's why I weep sometimes at my kids' birthday party celebrations. It's the idea of what could have been and what isn't, not because of us but because God moved something in our hearts and gave us children in a way we would never have imagined.
Adoption is a gracious gift that extends in both directions...into their lives and hearts and into ours. But I submit that the greatest blessing is this mama's life, sitting on a comfy couch surrounded by two beautiful black-haired, brown-eyed Asian beauties; and dreaming of the rambunctious, rowdy Asian boy that is coming our way. xxxooo
I sat in the sunshine and remembered the adoption travel conference call that I listened to earlier this week. Our amazing adoption agency's founder, Josh with CCAI, reminded us that without action these waiting children (like our Levi) would live out their lives in an orphanage, with no treatment, no education, no real hope. His cleft palate would likely remain untreated and he would be the equivalent of an "untouchable" in China.
So that's why I weep sometimes at my kids' birthday party celebrations. It's the idea of what could have been and what isn't, not because of us but because God moved something in our hearts and gave us children in a way we would never have imagined.
Adoption is a gracious gift that extends in both directions...into their lives and hearts and into ours. But I submit that the greatest blessing is this mama's life, sitting on a comfy couch surrounded by two beautiful black-haired, brown-eyed Asian beauties; and dreaming of the rambunctious, rowdy Asian boy that is coming our way. xxxooo
Monday, March 12, 2012
Here we go...
The 10 day count down is on. This blog is, let me lovingly warn you, going to be neglected until we get to China. I am going off the grid to prepare for the trip. No time for reflection--I just have to get 'er done.
Here's what I'm doing: going to Target, taking care of a sick kiddo, preparing and freezing meals for the family, packing, back to Target, Bible study with my best girls, soccer tournament over the weekend, probably Target again, showing my mother-in-law the ropes, carpooling, finalizing packing, getting kids to birthday parties, homeschooling, taking it all in, loving every minute. Must admit that I do have dreams of a pedicure somewhere about next Monday-ish.
So, y'all come back and read because in just a little while there are going to be some a-maz-ing stories to share.
It lights me up to think that Geng Hui Levi Melton somewhere across the world from us has absolutely no idea that we are getting ready to hold him close, love him dearly, treasure him forever. Miss you baby boy. Mommy's coming soon.
Here's what I'm doing: going to Target, taking care of a sick kiddo, preparing and freezing meals for the family, packing, back to Target, Bible study with my best girls, soccer tournament over the weekend, probably Target again, showing my mother-in-law the ropes, carpooling, finalizing packing, getting kids to birthday parties, homeschooling, taking it all in, loving every minute. Must admit that I do have dreams of a pedicure somewhere about next Monday-ish.
So, y'all come back and read because in just a little while there are going to be some a-maz-ing stories to share.
It lights me up to think that Geng Hui Levi Melton somewhere across the world from us has absolutely no idea that we are getting ready to hold him close, love him dearly, treasure him forever. Miss you baby boy. Mommy's coming soon.
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